Dienstag, 31. August 2010


to this day i can't ride escalators. sometimes there is only the escalator and no stairs. i hate that.
escalators remind me of this guy in prison, his nickname was escalator. he would always come back, never stop moving and made people ride him.

Montag, 30. August 2010

shower room

when i took my first shower i was scared. when i entered the steaming hot room i could perceive tiny words on the wall. i approached the writing and read "rule #2: liquid soap can't be picked up again". "thats really good to know" i thought. "but what is rule #1?" i asked out loud?. a big, muscular guy came closer from behind and whispered in my ear: "always point your back at the wall" while he spread my ass cheeks and had his way.

screaming should be common in universities, because it really helps you learn.

Sonntag, 29. August 2010

what i learned very quickly

when a big hulk-like dude made me his bitch on the first day i was hoping that the condition of being a bitch would only last one day. boy was i wrong. in retrospect having thought that makes me feel naïve.


if you have a friend in jail, don't bring him a cake with a file or cigarettes, bring him stool softener.


it is important to become healthy and fit. more workout means less rape. i learned that on the first day.
crunches and pushups are a must.

noobie guide for following

want to have more people following you? here is how.

when you follow someone, your picture is in their list. when your picture gets clicked two things are important.
first your blog must be linked in "links", otherwise people can't find your blog.
the other import thing is that you need to have a picture (preferably a meme). dont ask my why but i tend to click more on people that have a picture.

to get even more followers, click on the followers of blogs you follow, follow the followers and write comments with a link to your blog.

check your own list once in a while and follow everybody that follows you.

link this article in the comments of blogger who only have a few followers.

most important: follow me at

i follow back if you have a link linked.


the food wasn't that bad. there was only one problem. inmates who would flirt with the guards wouldn't get food all day. i always had to choose between flirting and food. i discovered you can make soup out of shoelaces, soap and mouthwash and dust. after my discovery i could flirt a lot more.


i pretended to be illitarate. out of mercy the guards would read to me sometimes. now that i am free there is no one to read to me.

Samstag, 28. August 2010

First Entry

In this Blog i will write about my time in prison. I am under the impression that there is only the first day and second days, hence the name.